everyone has a story.
Jan. 17th, 2003 08:35 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
brightbluegirlAs I was falling asleep last night, I thought:
Everyone has a story. Just because you're familiar and comfortable with your own, don't think someone else's is invalid.
I had several more dreams last night.
I dreamed that I was playing Klax at work (Klean Klaxers don't do drugs), but it was more like tetris. With snakes. I had to tickle the snakes to make them curl up into a ball.
I dreamed that Kurt and I went on a walk. He wasn't wearing any shoes. I told him I wanted to be his friend and asked him if he wanted to talk about the fight. He said no. I asked him if he just wanted to forget about it. He said yes. I gave him a big hug.
Yesterday at work this guy called on behalf of the president of some company that is a client of ours. He kept going on and on about how important this guy is because he's the president of the company "this is a really important guy, this guy is big, he wants his internet fast and he wants it now and blah blah blah".
And then he asked if we would give him a deal because he was the president of the company!!!!!!
I couldn't believe it. SO many times I wanted to just say "look, that man is not more important than I am, nor more important than you are. he's just a man." And when he asked for a DEAL! I mean, if anyone can afford to pay for their high speed internet, a fricken company president can.
That just goes against so many of the ideas I hold dear. It seems so obvious to me why that person should not be considered better than anyone else. Why the things that are important are compassion and understanding and self knowledge. Blah. I don't feel like getting all ranty about the subject. But that's what I think.
I find it so hard to talk and write coherently lately. I've become firmly emotion based, and when I'm so deep into my emotional side, I can't form the words and sentences I want to say, I can't meld the passionate and the intelligent and get across the sentiment. I resort to "life is beautiful" or "we all need to be more compassionate" or "the sky was a yummy blue" or "I don't like that it feels wrong" when I know that I'm intelligent, that I have a large vocabulary, that I'm intuitive and insightful and I have so much to impart.
I'm trying to work on it - I've been trying to work on it since I started my first online diary, ever so long ago. Part of the problem is that I can't seem to care so much any more. Nothing really matters. I don't think much that I say or do affects people, and I can't see that trying really means anything.
Everyone has a story. Just because you're familiar and comfortable with your own, don't think someone else's is invalid.
I had several more dreams last night.
I dreamed that I was playing Klax at work (Klean Klaxers don't do drugs), but it was more like tetris. With snakes. I had to tickle the snakes to make them curl up into a ball.
I dreamed that Kurt and I went on a walk. He wasn't wearing any shoes. I told him I wanted to be his friend and asked him if he wanted to talk about the fight. He said no. I asked him if he just wanted to forget about it. He said yes. I gave him a big hug.
Yesterday at work this guy called on behalf of the president of some company that is a client of ours. He kept going on and on about how important this guy is because he's the president of the company "this is a really important guy, this guy is big, he wants his internet fast and he wants it now and blah blah blah".
And then he asked if we would give him a deal because he was the president of the company!!!!!!
I couldn't believe it. SO many times I wanted to just say "look, that man is not more important than I am, nor more important than you are. he's just a man." And when he asked for a DEAL! I mean, if anyone can afford to pay for their high speed internet, a fricken company president can.
That just goes against so many of the ideas I hold dear. It seems so obvious to me why that person should not be considered better than anyone else. Why the things that are important are compassion and understanding and self knowledge. Blah. I don't feel like getting all ranty about the subject. But that's what I think.
I find it so hard to talk and write coherently lately. I've become firmly emotion based, and when I'm so deep into my emotional side, I can't form the words and sentences I want to say, I can't meld the passionate and the intelligent and get across the sentiment. I resort to "life is beautiful" or "we all need to be more compassionate" or "the sky was a yummy blue" or "I don't like that it feels wrong" when I know that I'm intelligent, that I have a large vocabulary, that I'm intuitive and insightful and I have so much to impart.
I'm trying to work on it - I've been trying to work on it since I started my first online diary, ever so long ago. Part of the problem is that I can't seem to care so much any more. Nothing really matters. I don't think much that I say or do affects people, and I can't see that trying really means anything.
