brightbluegirl

I'm feeling really crabby this morning. :( I didn't want to get up, and now here I am, and I'm supposed to test a lot of defects logged by other people, but one of our servers is down, which I need for testing purposes, and the other stuff, I have NO IDEA how to test, because I'm not familiar with the section at all! I've already asked the lead for help, so she conveniently disappeared.

So I'm being a big crybaby. Sorry. :(

I'd really rather just go home and crawl back into bed and do nothing until tomorrow.

Last night I wasn't in a good mood either. I was very tired, from getting up early, so I went for a nap in the evening, but I only napped for about 45 minutes. Then I woke up with a horribly itchy eye (I think a cat hair got in it), and I couldn't sleep, so I was hanging out in the bathroom with cold wet cloths on my eye. It eventually got better, and I even worked out (EXTREMELY against what I wanted to do), but the high from working out only lasted for a couple of minutes, and I was down in the dumps again. Sucky.

I have to go Christmas shopping this weekend, because I have to at least buy the presents for my mom and brother and his girlfriend before next wednesday. The problem is that although I know what I want to get them, the stuff is in places that are far away from each other. And then I'm going to make those cookies...

Bleh. I am just SO not motivated to be here. Even knowing we need the money, and all that stuff... just makes it worse. *sigh* Even though there's nothing really wrong with this job, I lay awake for over an hour last night telling myself that renewing my contract for a year (should that be offered) will be a really good thing, that it would really really help with our finances (Extremely) and with my stress level and feeling of security. But already I'm dreaming of wide open fields and a walkabout and a little cafe that's all my own, and all the things that led me to not trying very hard to find a new job after I got laid off, before.

I think it's just my headspace, though. I'll get over it, because right now, as capitalist as it sounds, the money really IS the most important thing.

And, luckily, there's a lot to look forward to in the next year. Things like the visit to Edmonton, Christmas, a (perhaps) trip in March, our ceremony, and etc. With lots of things to look forward to, I should be able to keep myself motivated...

Well, except for days like today.

Bleh.